Its 9:39 PM and Here's What I Think.

Its one of those nights where I feel like my head and heart are about to run themselves ragged. 

I need to escape to somewhere.

------------------

School has worn me down. The Norton Anthology of (insert class subject here) has worn me down.

Wedding planning has worn me down.

This apartment has worn me down. 

BV has worn me down. Winter has worn me down.

An 11 month engagement has worn me down.

The same old song and dance has worn me down.

------------------

Every time I'm driving with Joey I think about how easy it would be to get on the highway and just keep driving until we decide we've gotten far enough away. Not forever, just for a little break, but a vital break. 

------------------

When things get tough, I always day dream about Italy and how desperately I want to go back there with Joey. It makes my heart hurt sometimes.

------------------

As I write this, I'm realizing that sometimes I'm ashamed of how I feel. As soon as I typed everything, I immediately started to type an apology for my cheesy-ness, drama-ness, sappy-ness, girli-ness, emotional-ness, -- whatever-ness, as if I'm not allowed to be frustrated or stir crazy or impatient ever. But world, this is how I feel right now, 

and there is nothing wrong with that. 

------------------

I'm happy, I am. But right now my heart craves a change of scenery, a change of pace. An escape with the one I love from the life I know. I crave the novel and new.